15 Ways to Find Your Purpose of Life & Realize Your Meaning

Reading my philosophy thesis was like receiving an email from my 25-year-old self.

“You don’t find meaning; you create it,” was my answer to the questionwhat is meaning?

Drawn in by the unforgiving directness of the existentialist philosophersI was (perhaps naively) attempting to respond to the question that Albert Camus said must be answered before all others: Is there meaning in life? Orto state it more clearly: Is a life worth living? (Camus1975).

This article explores a few of the questions central to the vast and complex topic of meaning and purpose in life and introduces techniques and tools to help clients find answers.

Before you continuewe thought you might like to download our five positive psychology tools for free. These creativescience-based exercises will help you learn more about your valuesmotivationsand goals and will give you the tools to inspire a sense of meaning in the lives of your clientsstudentsor employees.

What Is the Purpose of Life? A Philosophical and Psychological Take

In The Myth of SisyphusAlbert Camus (1975)when faced with what he saw as the meaninglessness of existencesuggested we live life to its fullest rather than attempt an escape.

For Camusas with his contemporary Jean-Paul Sartreexistentialism concerns itself with the uniqueness of the human condition (Sartre1964). According to the existentialist formulalife has no inherent meaning. We have free choice andthereforechoose our values and purpose.

But where did existentialism come from?

The sense of freedom that existentialism offers is crucial – jolting us out of a comfortable malaise. It builds on Friedrich Nietzsche’s thinking that there are no universal facts and that man is isolated. He is bornlivesand dies – alone (Nietzsche1911; Kaufmann1976).

Rather than dictating how the reader should liveNietzsche tells us we should create our values and our sense of purpose.

And yetif cast freehow do we create meaning and purpose?

Existentialism is indebted to Edmund Husserl’s work on perception to answer this and other questions. Writing in 1900Husserl regards meaningalong with perceptionas the creation of the individual. Meaning is not objective – to be found in the external world – but built up from our mental states (Warnock1970).

Martin Heidegger – often described as the first true existentialist – picks up on this idea in the heavy-weight Being and Timewritten in 1927. For us to be authentic – following a state of anxiety born out of a realization that we are free – we must take responsibility for our actionsour purposeand our meaning (Heidegger1927/2013).

Existentialism and the struggle for meaning

Sartre continues this line of thinking in Being and Nothingness (1964):

“…every manwithout any support or help whateveris condemned at every instant to invent man.”

Separate from the worldwe must realize the horror that we are free to do and create meaning. And yetto avoid bad faith (or inauthenticity)we must accept that we are responsible not only for ourselves but also for all people.

To the existentialistour sense of meaning and purpose comes from what we do.

But can science and psychology help us find either? Yesprobably.

Meaning and psychology

Increasinglypsychologists have begun to realize the importance of meaning to our wellbeing and happiness.

Recent research suggests that people with increased meaning are better off – they appear happierexhibit increased life satisfactionand report lowered depression (Huo et al.2019; IvtzanLomasHefferon& Worth2016; Steger2009).

Neverthelessmeaning is a complex construct that can be approached from multiple angles; for examplecognitivelyappraising situations for meaningand motivationally to pursue worthwhile goals (Eysenck & Keane2015; Ryan & Deci2018).

While there are many definitions of meaning in psychologyLaura Kinga psychologist at the University of Missouriprovides us with the following useful description (Heintzelman & King2015):

Meaning in life “may be defined as the extent to which a person experiences his or her life as having purposesignificanceand coherence.”

Whether meaning is derived from thoughtful reflection or only as a byproduct of cognitive processingit is vital for healthy mental functioning. After allwe only attach importance to an experience and see it as significant if it has meaning. Similarlya sense of meaning and purpose is crucial to create an environment for pursuing personal goals.

A fascinating study in 2010 took a very different perspectivebringing us closer to our initialphilosophical discussion. The realization that there is only one certainty in life – death – can cause great anxiety for many.

The Terror Management Theory (TMT) suggests that features that remind us of our mortality are likely to heighten fear around death (Routledge & Juhl2010). HoweverTMT also suggests that a life “imbued with meaning and purpose” can help stave off such angst.

Philosophically and psychologicallyit is clear that meaning is a fundamental component of our human existence.

How to Find the Purpose of Your Life

Though often used interchangeablymeaning and purpose are not the same.

Meaning refers to how we “make sense of life and our roles in it,” while purpose refers to the “aspirations that motivate our activities” (Ivtzan et al.2016).

The terms are sufficiently close to saying that in the absence of eitherour life lacks a story. As humanswe need something to strive for and a sense of connectedness between the important moments that make up our existence (Steger2009).

Sometimesseeing the bigger picture or recognizing our place in the broader scheme can bring great insights and even play a role in our experience of meaning in life (Hicks & King2007).

Share the following ideas and insights with your clients:

Mote of dust suspended in a sunbeam

In 1990astronomer Carl Sagan convinced NASA to spin the Voyager 1 Space Probe around to take one last look at Earth as the probe left the solar system. The picture it took was unlike any other before or since. Roughly 3.7 billion miles away and traveling at 40,000 miles per hourit captured Earth as a small pale blue dot against a band of sunlight.

The image either leaves you with a sense of deep horror at our insignificance in a vastuncaring universe or a sense of wonder at how we came into being in such a “vast cosmic arena.”

This realization is captured beautifully in Carl Sagan’s words and this stunning computer simulation.

Broadening the mind

Alternate points of view that broaden the mind may help an individual experience an increased sense of meaning in life (Hicks & King2007). With that in mindwork with your client to widen their outlook and experience others’ thoughts to challenge what they know and think.

Ask your client to:

• Read widely.
  Explore new ideas and beliefs that reach beyond your comfort zone.
• Widen your group of friends and contacts.
  Seek out those who have unique ways of looking at things – positive people who will encourage you to grow.
• Learn the methods of evidence-ledscientific thinking.
  Rational thinking can provide the opportunity to free yourself from biased judgments.

Finding meaning through growth

Adopting a growth mindset can also lead to increased purpose in life. Help your client move away from a fixed mindset and open up to finding new purpose through exploration and challenge (LeeHwang& Jang2018; Smith2018).

Work with your client to:

• Find and build on their strengths. Try out some free online questionnaires such as the Values in Action Inventory or the CliftonStrengths Assessment. Once identifiedsee how they can use their strengths more regularly in daily life.
• Explore weaknesses. If they aren’t holding the client backhelp them to accept their weaknesses. If weaknesses prevent the client from living the life they wish to leadtry out techniques to build resilience and adopt a growth mindset.
• Help the client understand that the meaning they give to life is subjective and just as valid as anyone else’s.
• Accept that mistakes are part of learning.
• Encourage them to find ways to motivate themselves by building on intrinsic factors such as tasks that they feel related toautonomous inand can grow in competence (Ryan & Deci2018). After allmeaning is fundamental to motivation (Heintzelman2018).
• Help others. Work for charities or provide support where needed.
• Studies have shown that fostering a sense of awegratitudeand altruism can help strengthen a sense of purpose.
• Ask the client to listen to the positive things people have to say about them.
• Writing or reading about personal experiences can help develop a shared understanding of meaning. Not only does it build a sense of who we arebut it also makes sense of our experiences.

10 Techniques to Help Yourself and Others

The sources of meaning and a sense of purpose in our lives are highly personalsubjectiveand will vary throughout our lives.

Promotion of happiness themes

The following activities and techniques can promote key themes in our lives as sources of meaning (Ivtzan at al.2016):

• Support others (and receive others’ support) by joining clubs – strengthening bonds and building relationships.
• Share feelingsdesireshopesgoalssuccessesand failures with a close friend or significant other to increase intimacy.
• Focus outside yourself on causespursuitsand responsibilities to self-transcend.
• Pursue goals and strive for achievement in areas aligned with your values.
• Become comfortable in who you are. Feel the satisfaction of meaning by practicing self-acceptance.
• Express and experience respect and fairness.
• Obtaining materialistic desires can be significant and meaningful for some.
• Working towards professional goals can be purposeful for many.
• Pursuit of pleasure and happiness brings meaning and purpose to many but can be short lived.

Reflect on your sources of meaning

Having shared the above list with your clientask them to:

1. Rank on a sheet of paper their personal sources of meaning (italics above).
2. Review which ones are central and most influential.
3. Reflect on the opportunities to strengthen the ones that rank less highly.

4 Useful Worksheets

The following tools and techniques are taken from our Positive Psychology Toolkit© and can support your work with clients in their search for purpose and meaning. The exercises are briefly explainedand can be access with a subscription to the Toolkitwhich contains over 400 useful tools.

Living a meaningful life can be facilitated by a greater awareness of core values and the thoughts behind them. The insights provided by understanding personal values can help regain a sense of meaning to improve motivation.

Values

Values represent what we consider essential and what we live for in life. They combine both the core psychological needs of the self and society’s norms.

Work with your client to identify what is most valuable to them before they commit to action; for examplebeing creativelearningor showing compassion to others.

The Value Cards group exercise provides 42 values (plus some blanks) that can be cut out to form a deck of cards.

Ask each person in the group to:

• Lay the value cards out in front of you.
• Study and reflect on each one.
• Identify the five cards that best represent your core values.
• If comfortableshare your core values with others in the group to see what each person has chosen.
• Once completedselect the card that represents your strongest value.
• Explain to another person in the group why it is your strongest value and offer examples (enjoy this celebration of successes).
• Select another value that you would like to live into more and discuss with another person in the group.
• Select and share your core value with the group.

Life domains

Some values are specific to life domains. For exampleproductivity may be more suited to our professional life and compassion in our home life; as our domains change throughout our livesso too can our values.

A Values Vision Board can provide an excellent visual means for clients to become more aware and connect to their values.

Ask your client to:

• Create a vision boardusing pictures cut from magazines and stuck to paper or software such as Powerpoint or Keynote.
• Try grouping the images by domain or in order of overall life values.
• Work on it through feeling rather than rational thinkingwith no goals in mind.
• Share your thoughts about the vision board with the therapist or a close friend.
• Place the vision board somewhere it can be seen daily. Regularly return to the board to see if values have shifted and whether life is still balanced with the core values.

Emotion and goal-driven behavior

Despite the importance of our valuesthey can easily be ignored or even avoided.

Powerful emotions often overtake our values in directing our behavior. We fear writing the book we have always wanted or doubt our ability to commit to a relationship.

While goals can be vital to meeting our long-term plansthey can cause us to lose sight of what is important. We may be so focused on finding a partnerowning a houseor starting a family that we lose sight of enjoying life and building a group of friends.

The Values-Based Goal Setting exercise can help translate values into committed action.

Ask the client to:

• Choose a life domainfor exampleparentingrelationshipworketc.
• Think about what you would like to change in that domain.
• Consider why it is essential to make that change.
• Write down beside each reason what value it underpinsfor examplework/life balanceloveetc.
• Use the SMART acronym (specificmeaningfuladaptiverealistictime-framed) to translate these values into concrete goals.
• Review regularly to confirm that these are your goals (not someone else’s) and that your core values remain unchanged.

Shifting and replacing values

Near-death experiences are frequently associated with a re-assessment of a person’s valuesincluding increased concern for othersan appreciation for lifeand a decrease in materialism.

Considering our mortality (while challenging) can improve our awareness of what is genuinely important.

The My Gravestone exercise is a powerful tool for reevaluating how we spend our time on Earth. If appropriate to the client’s circumstancesask your client to:

• Imagine their life is over.
• Using the shape of a tombstonewrite out their namebirth dateetc.
• Write a couple of sentences or phrases that capture how they would like to be remembered and how they would like to have spent their time.

This is an extremely difficult exercise for many and should only be performed if the client is ready and willing to cope with the emotions that may arise.

A Note on Finding Meaning After TraumaDivorceand Others

The most painful experiences can often also be the most meaningful.

A near-death experienceserious illnessseparationor loss of a loved one can all shake our sense of who we are and force us to reevaluate our core valueslife purposeand sense of meaning.

Indeedresearch on trauma survivors has observed post-traumatic growth and the capacity to extract meaning from adversity (Routledge & Juhl2010).

PositivePsychology.com’s Resources

Our blog contains many more excellent articles on the meaning of life and finding happinessbut one intriguing read you may especially enjoy is our article on Ikigaiwhich is a Japanese philosophy that evolved from health and wellness principles.

Our Masterclass on Meaning and Valued Living© provides an intuitive and accessible way to apply positive psychology.

This excellent online program is for therapistspsychologistscounselorscoachesand practitioners who want to help their clients find meaning and discover their valuesconnecting them to their ‘why’ so that they can bear the ‘how.’

If you’re looking for more science-based ways to help others discover meaningthis collection contains 17 validated meaning tools for practitioners. Use them to help others choose directions for their lives in alignment with what is truly important to them.

A Take-Home Message

The meaning we attach to our selfthe world around usand our role within it form our narrative. Our purpose – our aim and goals – motivates the activities that take us through it.

Thereforeit is reasonable to conclude that both meaning and purpose are vital to our wellbeing as well as crucial to who we are.

If we accept the existentialists’ viewthen we are free to lead a life according to our valuesassign a meaning to what we see as vitaland pursue a unique purpose.

As Sartre points outthis realization may begin with anguish and spiral to a sense of vertiginous nausea before we act. After allit is like being dropped at a cliff’s edgewithout the option of going back and an uncertain future ahead.

Insteadwe must choose our values and the meaning we assign to who we arehow we liveand what we do. Our goals are personaland we must decide whether to follow them or let them drift out of sight.

But failing to act authentically and live according to the meaning and purpose we have chosen would result in a less-well-lived life. Sotry the exercises within this article – if only to better understand who you areyour core valuesand your place in your surroundings – and explore potential yet to be written.

We hope you enjoyed reading this article. Don’t forget to download our five positive psychology tools for free.